Sometimes the grief we bear seems too heavy and great. Grief is a part of living that comes to us all. God offers some help and an outlet—He carries our grief and sorrows (Isaiah 53:4). One source of help is the understanding that those who have died know nothing (Ecclesiastes 9:5). We may be deep in grief over the loss of someone we love—but for whom are we grieving if the dead know nothing?

A mourner grieves for himself. We are grieving for ourselves and for that which we have lost from our lives by the death of a loved one. That sort of grief taken to the extreme can become selfish. Grief is an expression of an outgoing love when properly shown. Grief helps us understand the love we have for another and helps us determine to be better in our conduct toward others. We share our sorrow with others, and that is one way through which we love our neighbor. Grief can be a healing force—but it needs to be allowed to pass before it becomes a time when we are only feeling sorry for ourselves. The dead do not know that we grieve (Ecclesiastes 9:5).