Christ warned us that if we want to be forgiven by God, we must forgive others from the heart. Consider the parable of the servant who was forgiven a great deal, yet wouldn’t forgive a fellow servant a small debt.

"Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses" (Matthew 18:32-35).

The word forgive literally means to not require compensation from someone. When we forgive, we release a person from having to pay for an obligation to us. (Only God can forgive the person spiritually, upon his or her repentance. Thankfully our God is both just and merciful.) It is relatively easy to decide as an act of will to release a person from paying a debt, but when you’ve been dealt a huge injury and you will be hurting for years to come, it’s hard to completely let go of resentment and revenge. Over the years, I have repeatedly caught myself in denial—I had said the words of forgiveness, and meant them and acted on them—but deep inside I was still hurt and angry. I had not completely let go.

Matters of the heart—the emotions—can’t be solved by mental resolve or force of will. Matters of the heart have to be resolved in the heart. The dimension that I had missed was compassion. The more I learned about the people who had offended me, the more I was able to feel compassion for them. That compassion melted away anger and resentment, and enabled me to let go completely.

Jesus showed compassion to those He met. He healed the sick (Matthew 9:35-36), and raised the poor widow’s only son (Luke 7:12-14). And on the cross He expressed His compassion in forgiveness: "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do" (Luke 23:34).

We are commanded not only to forgive, but also to extend compassion (1 Peter 3:8; Jude 22; Colossians 3:12). For me, it is the dimension of compassion that makes forgiveness of life’s great hurts possible. Before I can forgive from the heart, my heart must be moved to compassion.

Jesus has great compassion for us (Hebrews 2:17; 4:15-16), and we must learn to have that same compassion towards our fellowman. We don’t want to come before the judgment seat of Christ and be told, "Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?"

— Jay Turner
San Jose, California, congregation