[Steve Myers] Welcome to "Epistles of Paul." We have been studying 1 Corinthians, and we left off last time in 1 Corinthians 7. And Paul is discussing marriage. Is it appropriate to divorce? What about our children if we're church members or if there's only one member of the family in the Church? What about our children? Paul discusses all of these questions in 1 Corinthians 7. And we had touched on the fact that our children are called. He makes that point, even if there's just one member of the family, even if it's just the husband or just the wife, that puts the children in a special category. So if you take a look at 1 Corinthians 7, he makes a point of that very thing in verse 14.

1 Corinthians 7:14 He says, "The unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband. Otherwise, your children would be unclean, but now they are holy."

Of course, we made that point that they are holy. That word can be set apart. It means hagios, to be set apart. They're in a special category, in other words. And so it certainly begs the question, are our children called today? There's an interesting passage, if you hold your place here in 1 Corinthians 7, just go over to Romans 8 for just a moment. I thought I'd just take a couple of minutes as we start today to think about this idea of our children being called. We didn't spend a lot of time on it previously, and I just thought I'd go back and just take a moment to talk about that. And in Romans 8:29, it gives us the big picture here when you think about God's calling, baptism, being a part of the Church, and it kind of maps that out as we look at Romans 8. Take a look at verse 29.

Romans 8:29 It says, "For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. Moreover, whom He predestined, those He also called, whom He called, these He also justified, and whom He justified, these He also glorified."

So that's kind of a big picture. God has a plan. He predetermined that He would call human beings into his family. That's kind of the idea of what he's getting at here. God has a predetermined plan, and that plan is to create a spiritual family. And so how does that happen? Well, ultimately, he says that He calls people. He calls people. And that word used there is the word kaleo. Kaleo is the word for called here, and it has that connotation of an invitation or summons, for example. And so he's describing these events that God uses to bring people to eternal life. And of course, the ultimate part of this here is that if we're going to be in the kingdom, what are we going to be like?

He says we're going to be like His Son. We will be conformed to the image of His Son. That's been predetermined. That's been pre-decided. If we're going to be in the kingdom, we have to be like Jesus Christ. And so God summons people. He calls people. He invites people to be a part of His plan and His purpose.

Matthew 22:14 You may remember that Christ Himself said, "Many are called, but few are chosen."

That's found in Matthew 22:14. And there we find the whole example of a parable that Christ gives where He talks about those that God invites. And He invites many people. Many people are invited to be a participant in God's plan. In fact, He also gives the parable of the sower where He talks about all kinds of seed is spread like a calling. But there are different responses. Some grow, some start to flourish and then fade away, and so it illustrates these different reactions to God's calling. And of course, we know that calling only happens as the Father draws individuals to Himself. So John 6:44 talks about that very fact that the Father draws us. He attracts us. And so it's kind of interesting to look at those various words and how they all connect to this idea of an invitation or a summons, that God is working with people.

The interesting part that we find in 1 Corinthians 7 is that the children of church members, even if it's only one, mom or dad, they're in this special category that God is working with them, that God is calling them. And when you begin to think about it, can children understand spiritual things? I think so. They certainly can have a grasp on how to have a relationship, how to have a relationship with God. Do we have any biblical examples of God actually working with little children? Anybody think of an example?

[Man] Samuel.

[Steve Myers] Yeah, how about Samuel? Samuel is a great example of that. As a little boy, God was working with him. Was He calling him? Was He inviting him to be a part of God's purpose and His plan? Well, of course, he was. And so that's probably one of the best examples when we consider that. And of course, as we look at the parents' responsibilities, the Proverbs talk a lot about parents bringing up their children in a godly way, that parents have that responsibility to teach their children. Deuteronomy 6 certainly talks a lot about that very fact, as parents, as a part of the Church, have that duty. They have that responsibility to teach their children about God's way.

And so even if we fast forward to the New Testament, there's a wonderful example that reminds us of what Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7 that happens at the very beginning of the New Testament Church. Of course, where do we find the very beginning of the New Testament Church? Acts 2. So if you look over at Acts 2 for just a moment, notice how these different areas of Scripture with what Christ taught, with what parents are expected to teach their children, even the beginning of the Church all tie in to this idea of what Paul was teaching the Corinthians in 1 Corinthians 7. So let's see, where do we want to go here? In Acts 2, notice what we're told here in verse 38. Acts 2:38, here, as Peter is preaching as the Church began, this is Pentecost. This is that very first Pentecost, the beginning of the New Testament Church.

Acts 2:38 And Peter says to them, "Repent and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit."

Of course, he's describing the time that Christ talked about being chosen. You're called, God summons you, God invites you, but you're not chosen until you receive the Spirit, until you're baptized. Now you have the Holy Spirit, you've been chosen. And so he's describing that. And as he does, take a look at what he says.

Acts 2:39 "For the promise is to you and to your children and to all who are far off, as many as the Lord our God will call."

And so, does that tell us our children are in a special category? I mean, no doubt about that, no doubt. Peter says they're in a unique situation. Paul says exactly the same thing. He says, "Well, your children would be unclean, but they're not." They're not. They're holy. They're set apart in a special category. Now, of course, he's mapping out here in Acts 2, they still need to receive God's Spirit. They still need to repent. They still need to have faith. Certainly, that's the case. But what we begin to see here is that, in a sense, this is a process, isn't it? Does God just say, "All right, here's the invitation," and then it's done, it's over? I don't think that's the case. I think what we find, especially with children, is that it's an ongoing process that God is interacting with us. He's interacting with people as He's calling them, whether they're children or adults. And so ultimately, He wants all to come to repentance. I mean, where do we find that?

We know that's very much the case in 2 Peter 3:9. It tells us that very thing, that God doesn't want any to perish but all to come to repentance. And so we see this powerful example that our children, because of a baptized parent, are in a special situation. They're in a special relationship with God. God's inviting them, He's summoning them, and He wants them a part of the family. He wants them to come to repentance. He wants them to come to baptism. And so He wants that relationship with Him. And so this is just kind of giving you a little thumbnail sketch of this idea of how our children are called by God.

Now, they haven't received God's Spirit yet. Christ delineated that pretty clearly even when He talked to His disciples before the crucifixion. You probably remember what He told them. Before the crucifixion, He said, "The Spirit is with you," but He told them about a future time after that, the time that they would receive God's Spirit. And then He said, "It will be in you." And so He delineated that big difference between that. And so He talked about that very clearly. Where do you find that? John 14:15, 16, 17, kind of in that area where Christ delineated that difference.

So we could apply that to our kids. Our children today, the Spirit is with them. God is working with them. He's calling them. He's inviting them to be a part of the process. Parents, we have a responsibility to train our children, bring them up in the admonition of the Lord. We have that responsibility mapped out in Deuteronomy 6 that we talk about God's way, we teach them God's way, and we help build that connection as God's Spirit works with them.

And then we certainly pray that they would respond to God's calling and that they would choose then to repent, have that faith, that confidence in God, and develop a relationship, and come to baptism. And so, what a blessing. What a blessing that God calls our children. In fact, we do have a paper that if you'd like to study it, "Our Children Called" is a doctrinal study paper that the Church has produced. It's online. If you go to the study papers on our website, you can find it there. And that details a whole lot of information that I've just kind of given you a little thumbnail sketch of today, but you can take a look at that and get into this idea even that much further with many more passages throughout Scripture to really recognize the fact that God is certainly calling our children today.

All right. Well, let's head back to 1 Corinthians 7. Now, it is interesting that all of this has come up in the context of marriage. And what is our responsibility as married individuals? You know, if we're in the Church, God says, you don't divorce. That's the lesson that we've talked about throughout 1 Corinthians 7. You're married, you're in the Church, you don't divorce. There is no reason to divorce. You can...well, I suppose, in one sense, you could divorce, but then, can you get remarried? As we look at 1 Corinthians 7, no. If you were to separate, the only option you have if you both claim to be converted is to come back together, to reconcile, to reunite. That's it. That's the only option that you have as baptized members of God's Church.

Of course, Paul also outlined the fact that if one member comes into the Church, let's say the husband comes into the Church and the wife doesn't, should they divorce? No, 1 Corinthians 7 says very clearly, "No, don't divorce your husband." Don't divorce your husband. And it's interesting that it ties in with the fact of God's calling. How do you know? In fact, if you're back there in 1 Corinthians 7, he mentions it very clearly.

1 Corinthians 7:12 He says, "If a brother has a wife who doesn't believe and she's willing to live with him, let him not divorce her."

Because even that unbelieving mate at that point is in a special category, verse 14, the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband. And so they're also in a special category. And who knows? You put it in God's hands, God may call them and continue to work with them and they may respond to that calling. And so He says, "Don't divorce."

Now, one of the other things we began to talk about last time was the fact that an unbeliever might depart. And when we begin to talk about reasons for divorce and then the connection with potentially remarrying, that is certainly one of the considerations when an unbeliever departs. Now, of course, the believer doesn't force them out. They don't divorce them. It's when someone who doesn't believe leaves the marriage. They may leave the marriage literally, they may walk away, or they leave the marriage as not being a participant. They don't want to be married. They don't act like they want to be married. They might be abusive. There might be other situations that would come into play in that regard that shows them as an unbeliever.

And if they depart, what's the instruction in that sense? Well, verse 15 describes that very thing. If an unbeliever departs, it says, a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases, but God has called us to peace. And so pretty evident then and maybe not that hard to sort out. If a person comes into the Church, their mate doesn't, they're an unbeliever, they don't participate in the marriage, they don't want it to work, is that a legitimate reason to divorce? Yeah. If they're not willing, absolutely. If they don't want a part of the marriage, they are antagonistic against the believer, if there's problems in that regard, okay. Well, that would be one of those exceptional situations.

Now, is it possible for two individuals that are both in the Church? Could this category apply in that situation? Both are supposed to be baptized members. Could this possibly apply in that situation? Yes. Yes, it's possible. There's an interesting passage that connects this together. If we take a look at what Paul wrote to Titus, take a look at Titus 1. In Titus 1:15, here, we find an interesting situation that the apostle Paul describes, and it could certainly include too that claim to be believers. They claim to be baptized members of God's Church. And in Titus 1:5, we find an interesting...I'm sorry, not verse 5, verse 15. Verse 15. We find an interesting scenario that's described here. Let's notice what he says here. Of course, this is Paul also writing to Titus here as he was writing to the Corinthians as well.

Titus 1:15 He says, "To the pure, all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure. But even their mind and conscience are defiled.”

And so you might think, "Well, that's talking about somebody that's not in the Church, who doesn't claim to be a part of the Church." Kind of sounds almost like that situation, you have one believing mate and the other unbelieving. But that's not what he's talking about here. If we read on, notice what it says, verse 16.

Titus 1:16 "They profess to know God, but in works they deny Him, being abominable, disobedient, and disqualified for every good work."

So it's possible for a member or someone who claims to be a member of the Church to actually be an unbeliever. How do you know the difference? Well, he's describing, what are they doing? What are their actions? What are their actions? They say they are, but their actions prove otherwise. Their actions are showing they're really an unbeliever. And so, in that case, that individual has departed. They've departed from the marriage. You might imagine a situation where an individual like this might become abusive. That would certainly be one of those cases that they're denying the truth. They're denying the fact that they are a member. They're really not. And so that habitual pattern of conduct is really what comes into play.

We know, in Galatians 5, it talks about the fruit of the Spirit, all these beautiful characteristics. It also talks about the works of the flesh and all of those things that are kind of described here with being disobedient and disqualified, those things that aren't Christian. And so, when we recognize that, they're not willing to repent, they're not willing to change, they have departed not only from the faith but from the marriage. And so, this first category could also include someone who claims to be a part of the Church but is acting otherwise. Would that be a legitimate reason to divorce? Yeah. Yes, according to Paul, yes, that is the case. And so that becomes part of the ideas and the standards that Paul goes through in 1 Corinthians 7.

Now, what happens to the believing mate? The unbeliever departs, they get a divorce. Can that believing mate get remarried? Yes. Yes, absolutely. And so that's what Paul describes here. So if you head back to 1 Corinthians 7, we see that certainly is the case, that they would be free to marry under that circumstance. Now, it's also interesting, we said, you could put it in another category. I oftentimes think of it, personally, someone who is abusive would certainly fall under that category of being an unbeliever, some kind of abuser. You don't stay in a marriage where you're being beaten or abused in that sense. They are unbeliever. Would that be a legitimate cause for a divorce? Yeah, absolutely. And so that's part of that same category, I believe, or you could even make it a second category of itself.

There's also another category that falls into this realm of divorce and then remarriage. And that's what you would call fraud. Fraud is another one of those categories that would certainly lend itself for someone splitting up, a couple splitting up, and then potentially being remarried. Okay, what is fraud all about? Well, when you think of fraud, it means someone is not truthful. One of the people in the marriage just isn't being truthful with the other. And of course, the interesting part is this is something that would happen before marriage. Before marriage. And it begs the question, does God bind fraudulent contracts? No. No, because the circumstances aren't truthful. They're not truthful. And so whether it's a contract, whether it's a marriage, yeah, that's not made under legitimate terms. And so that becomes pretty important when you consider this. It's something that would occur before marriage.

Now, why do I say that? Because it's already there in the mind of the one who's committing the fraud, who's misrepresenting themselves or straight out lying about who they really are. If that's the case, then they're withholding information from their future mate. Can you think of an example of something like that? All right, let's say I'm an alcoholic. Can an alcoholic hide that fact? Yeah, sometimes you can hide it pretty good. Yeah, absolutely. But I represent myself to my future wife as an upstanding Christian. I'm a good church member because I can show up sober, and I can do things, and you don't know that I'm an alcoholic. But once you're married and you're living together, it's a lot harder to hide that. Pretty soon, "Here's an empty bottle I found," and then there's misbehavior, and then there's other things that begin to happen.

Did they need to disclose that ahead of time? Absolutely. Absolutely, because now you're bearing false witness. You're lying about who you really are. And you can think of a number of different scenarios where that might play out. If you have any addictions in that regard, whether it's drugs or alcohol or porn or these kinds, that has to be disclosed. You have to tell the...you have to be straight up about who you are. Because, otherwise, the terms of the contract are being misrepresented. And this fraud would certainly be one that could cause a marriage to be dissolved. And so it's something that, once it's recognized, once this comes out, then you got to do something about it right away. Can you think of an example in the Bible where we get a little bit of insight into this concept of fraud in marriage?

[Man 2] Jacob gets the wrong wife the first time.

[Steve Myers] Okay, yeah, Jacob got the wrong wife. That was a fraudulent thing. Now, he stayed married to her and then worked another seven years for another one, which is an interesting circumstance. I wasn't necessarily thinking of him. Any others?

How about Joseph and Mary? Joseph and Mary is kind of an interesting example. If you take a look at what we're told here in Matthew 1, get back to the gospels for just a moment. And if you remember Joseph and Mary, Jesus' physical parents, remember the scenario with Mary. They are going to be married, right? I guess you could say they're engaged in that sense. And at the very beginning of Matthew, we find an interesting remark made here about the betrothal of Mary and Joseph. So, in our terms, I think you could say they're engaged. Well, what then happens? Well, she's found to be pregnant. So if you look at verse 18, Matthew 1:18, the birth of Jesus Christ was as follows:

Matthew 1:18 “After His mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, before they came together, she was found with child of the Holy Spirit."

So this is of God. Mary's pregnant with Christ. Joseph doesn't know the whole story now of suddenly his fiancé is pregnant. Well, that contract, "Now, wait a second, I thought you were a virgin, and you're not. You claim to be, and now you're pregnant? Something's going on here, right?" So, what does Joseph do?

Matthew 1:19 "Then Joseph, her husband, being a just man, not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly."

This would dissolve the contract. This was fraud in his mind at this point because he didn't know the circumstances. It seems like, yeah, she hasn't been loyal. She hasn't been faithful. And so here's this example of that very thing. He considered putting her away. What would have been the reason for putting her away? It wasn't being an unbeliever. It was fraud. She was misrepresenting herself, at least in Joseph's mind at this point. But then, what happens?

Matthew 1:20 "While he thought about these things, an angel of the Lord appeared."

And he recognizes, "Oh, wait a second, this is of God, I shouldn't do this." And so really this is kind of similar to an annulment, you might say. This was potentially a fraudulent situation. Could situations like that happen today? Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. But one thing you notice here that wasn't quite evident in this situation but would be evident in a situation where fraud would be a reason for divorce, what would it be?

This is deliberate deception, right? It's deliberate. "I'm not divulging something about myself to you, because if I did, you probably wouldn't marry me." So it's a deliberate kind of a thing. So fraud is deliberate deception, and deliberate deception under the law is non-binding. Yeah, you can't have a contract with deliberate deception. And so that would certainly annul a marriage. Now, practically, how would that work?

All right, let's say someone deceives their mate about who they are, what their character really is like, and they basically pull the wool over their eyes for a while until they get married. When do those things generally come out? Thirty years down the line? No. No, it usually comes out pretty quickly. Pretty quickly. You know, if you've got some type of addiction that you haven't divulged, if you've got a major character flaw, you claim to be a church member but then your whole behavior is nothing like that, you end up not being a faithful person and you start running around on your mate, those things usually come out pretty quickly, and it becomes evident pretty quickly.

So in a situation like that, what do you do? You immediately address that issue. You immediately address that issue, because if it's something that's going to annul the contract, you have to take care of it right away. You can't wait. You can't wait, because waiting says, what? I'm willing to put up with it. Willing to put up with it. I mean, can you think of an example?

Okay, let's just say your mate claims to be a virgin, and then you find out after you're married, no, they're not. Okay, if you're willing to live with them and you don't say anything about that, and then, 10 years later, you have problems in your marriage and difficulties or differences that you're having trouble with, well, can you then say, "Well, they weren't a virgin when we got married?" No, you can't do that. You were willing to put up with it all that time. Now, that's not the time. When those things come up, you need to address it immediately. And that's the time to deal with it, not years and years later.

And I think it also certainly points out the fact we're not talking about little flimsy reasons to claim fraud or something like that. I mean, when you get married, do you know every little thing about your future mate? No. No. Did my wife know I just throw my dirty clothes on the floor? At least, to start with, I probably didn't do that. I probably didn't divulge that. Is that a reason to divorce? Well, no, that's just a dopey thing. That's not an offense that would be fraudulent, not in that way. And so, yeah, there's a lot of things like that that you learn to live with, you learn to grow, you learn to change, all those types of things. So that's definitely not fraud.

But these other things that we're talking about certainly rise to that level, that level of deception that I intentionally withheld information so my future mate wouldn't know because then they might not marry me. And so that's important. And hopefully...does that bring up any questions regarding fraud when it comes to marriage?

Okay. Hopefully, that's fairly clear as well. So that certainly is a second reason, legitimate reason for divorce. Yeah, I had a situation one time that I was counseling a couple, long distance and seemed fantastic. They would come together occasionally while they were engaged when one would visit the other. They were in separate church areas, so it was a little bit of a challenge. Long-distance relationships are always a challenge in that regard. And when they come together, spend a weekend together, we'd get together, we'd counsel, and we'd talk about their future marriage. Everything's great. Of course, during that time, everybody puts their best foot forward.

They get married. About a week later, they find out there's addiction, undisclosed addiction. Well, immediately, it comes up. And in that case, the marriage was annulled. The contract was broken. Are they free to remarry again? Yes. Yes. Now, there is kind of an oddity when it comes to that as well because you basically have an offender and someone who's, in a sense, innocent at that time, the one who's not the offender, the one who hasn't disclosed and intentionally deceived the other.

Now, when there's no contract any longer, right, this contract is void, it's annulled, technically, they're both free to remarry, because there's no contract. Now, of course, a lot of things have to happen, especially with the offender. They've got to change. They've got to...you know, if they claim to be a church member, you know, you can't put up with blatant sin. That has to be repented of and that change has to occur before ever entering into a marriage contract in the future. That's got to change. But technically, they would be ultimately free to remarry because there's no contract. There is no contract.

Okay, now, there is a third reason, and we did discuss this a little bit earlier. We have sexual immorality. So as we consider this idea of divorce and remarriage, sexual immorality, of course, the word that's used is porneia, and we've talked quite a bit about that whole concept as well. If you want to head back to 1 Corinthians 7 once again, this would also be one of those issues that could come up, sexual immorality, porneia. And what does that entail? Well, a whole array of sexual immorality and whether it's adultery or whether it's pornography, whether it's bestiality, whether it's homosexual, there's a whole array of things that could fall under this category.

When someone, once again, they're acting like an unbeliever and, in this particular situation, because of immorality, that could break up a marriage. That could break up a marriage. Of course, we read that passage in Matthew where Christ talked about that, that that was certainly a legitimate reason for divorce. In fact, there's a number of passages in that regard that speak to that idea of a porneia. Maybe we could just remind ourselves, if we want to go back to Matthew. I don't believe last time we read Matthew 5, so maybe we could just read just for a moment Matthew 5:31. Verse 31, Christ made it pretty clear here. If you've got your red letter Bible, you'll see all the words here are red.

Matthew 5:31 Christ says, "It's been said, 'Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.'"

Which is basically saying, "Well, can you divorce for any reason?" Christ says, "No. No."

Matthew 5:32 He says, "I say to you," verse 32, "that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery."

And so we have this porneia, sexual immorality, that Christ Himself points to here. And so here it's unfaithfulness on the part of either person that then would be grounds for divorce and then with the eligibility to remarry. And so porneia is another one of those reasons here. And when you begin to think about this idea of unfaithfulness, marital infidelity, sexual immorality, is it automatic? So your husband cheats on you. Do you automatically divorce then? Well, it doesn't say that. Is it grounds for divorce? Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. Well, what if it was just a one-time thing? Could you just forgive and forget, go on? Depends. It really depends.

When we look at what Christ is getting at in really all these cases but specifically when you think of porneia, this is something that has totally dissolved the contract in the sense it has just torn that marriage apart. And could it be a one-time thing that could bring that about in someone's mind, or would it have to just be some kind of ongoing thing or some type of really crazy, you know, weird fetish kind of thing that would split somebody up? No. I mean, if you come together in marriage and you love your mate and you are so focused on making your marriage work, and when you entered this marriage, you were totally, completely, absolutely committed to that person, and you gave them everything, you gave them your heart, you gave them your mind, you were in this together, and they cheat on you, maybe only one time, in your mind, could that be so devastating that it's just torn that relationship completely apart? Could be.

I've counseled people through the years a couple of times, and just one illicit affair, one time, because the other was so totally committed, it just devastated them. It just could not be repaired. It doesn't mean that they couldn't ultimately forgive them, but it was such a commitment in that individual's mind that they would never even have thought of it, considered it, you know, entertained it in any way that, when it happened, it just devastated them, and it just ruined the bonds of marriage. And for them, for that individual, there wasn't any other choice. And what does the Bible say? Let them divorce. Let them divorce. It's such a sad situation. But you can understand, when you've totally given yourself to someone and they violate that faithfulness, it is devastating. It can be very, very devastating.

Now, at the same time, I've counseled people over the years where there was infidelity and somehow they worked through it. Somehow they worked through it. Can you forgive someone in that regard? Yeah, it's possible. It's possible. But, as you consider that, it certainly depends on the individuals and their perspective and the willingness to change and grow and try to work things out. And so it's not an automatic given.

In fact, I had one situation, one time many, many years ago, where it was discovered that one individual had actually been cheating on their mate over 25 years with the same person. So they're having an affair with the same person 25 years, and then it comes out. They've got grown kids by this time, and then this just explodes on the scene. Wow, look at this, what's happening? Now, that, you'd certainly say, well, "Wow, if there's any reason to divorce, that would be it." Split up, forget it. Are you kidding me? How could you possibly have that kind of ongoing behavior and have any expectancy to be forgiven?

But you know what, somehow that couple stayed together. Somehow they stayed together, and they worked through it, and they didn't divorce. And here I am thinking, "Boy, this is absolutely, you know...no doubt, this was going down. There's no way this marriage could survive." But somehow they were actually able to do that, and certainly, yeah, only with God's help. And I think it certainly took a very special person to be...I mean, even to consider trying to work through that. And so somehow they were able to do it.

And so when you look at these different situations, fraud is tough to work through. Yeah, that doesn't usually happen. Unbeliever departing, no. The sexual immorality at times. Yeah, it could be one time, and that's it. It's over. It's done. You know, the person just cannot deal with it. But it doesn't have to be automatic. And I think that's an important consideration. It's not automatic. And so certainly up to the individual who's been, you know, in that sense, the one who has been hurt and the one who has gone through the situation this way to decide, how are you going to handle this? What do you want to do about it?

And so if nothing else, what it should remind us of is how important this decision is. You don't want to enter marriage lightly. Do you want to get counseling? Absolutely. Do you want to know as much as you can about the other person before you get married? Yes, no doubt. I mean, it is, other than baptism, the most important decision that you'll make in your life. And so, yes, you want to make sure you're entering a marriage knowing as much about the other person as reasonably possible, because it is a wonderful thing. And God says, all the way back in Genesis, it's a very good thing, but you don't want to do it casually. You don't want to walk into a situation without counseling, without direction, without knowing the other person and having spent a lot of time talking about things and getting to know each other before you make that ultimate commitment.